100 Things About Me

Yes, I did steal this topic from my new favorite blogger: Stephanie Klein. Read Greek Tragedy: http://www.stephanieklein.blogs.com/

100 Things About Me:
(Written over a period of days when I felt egocentric)

1. Since about the age of 12, I have looked older than I am. I hope this stops soon.
2. I'm a true mutt. Cherokee/Seminole/African slave/German/Jewish/Irish/Scottish/French/Mexican Indian.
3. I don't like wearing shoes. If I had it my way, I would be barefoot 365 days a year.
4. I married someone just because I felt it was the "right" thing to do. I hope I have learned not to use honor in the future like an idiot. I believe it is a family thing, by the way. My mother and my brother did the same thing.
5. Although we mostly went to First Presbyterian churches, I have been exposed to Buddhism, Shintoism, Catholicism, Lutheran(ism?), Hinduism, Judaism...my dad had a personality crisis for about a decade.
6. I went through my first bout of depression in second or third grade. Ever since, I spend most of my days reading. The web, novels, magazines, newspapers. I can't stop. It fills the loneliness.
7. Animals like me. A lot.
8. My hair is naturally curly and blondish. Everytime I significantly cut it I look like a poodle, so I keep it long.
9. I like my lingerie frilly and girlie.
10. I'm a pretty great cook when I am not worrying about it.
11. I hate kool-aid.
12. I am not one of those people who drives a car that they like. (Afternote: I totalled the car I was speaking of here 8/17/05, so this doesn't apply as much anymore).
13. Meeting new people makes me anxious. Sometimes I throw up.
14. I met Charlie Sheen at a Hamburger Hamlet in LA. I met Roseanne Barr and Tom Arnold because her daughters were in the same nutty hospital my sister stayed at. I once saw Kareem Abdul Jabbar walking down the street - he is so tall I thought he was an alien.
15. On my worse days, I can drink 6 or 7 cups of coffee. Yes, my teeth are stained.
16. I smoke cigars. I love them and I am not ready to give them up.
17. Until I was about 13, I slept with my favorite teddy bear, fuzzy. I have lost him a few times, and all times I cried like a hysteric. The last time this happened was four years ago. He's in my closet on the shelf with my other favorite friends.
18. I am severely addicted to Pink Floyd. When I was in High School, I had a crush on a redneck who introduced me to early Pink Floyd. My life has been very, very different since then.
19. I am a speedreader. No, I haven't taken a class and I can't explain. My mother is the same way. When I was in third grade I just started reading - a lot. And really fast. When I am really into a book it is usually done in a couple of hours.
20. My mother is a direct descendant of Ullyses S. Grant, therefore making her a direct relative of the royal family of Britain.
21. My Dad's Great, Great grandfather was Rabbi Levi Zimmerman from Northern Germany.
22. When I was 10, I had an autistic boy knock me out on the sidewalk. His caretaker explained to my sister that he thought I was beautiful. I know the truth.
23. Lisa Rodman, my best friend in California, has not spoken to me for over a decade, since I fell in love with the wrong thing.
24. I prefer to be naked. If I had it my way, I would be naked all the time. I look much better in the buff. Clothes make you look fat.
25. Painkillers are completely ineffective for me. Last time I had surgery, they almost killed me just trying to make me pass out.
26. My daughter was supposed to be named Rowan. My ex-husband's ego got the best of him, and she was granted the name she has.
27. I don't love to sing anymore. A year of voice lessons wasted. Something happened, and his name is Chris.
28. A long time ago, a schizophrenic LSD dealer named Jerome was convinced I stole 3K worth of product from him, and wanted to kill me.
29. When I feel good in my own skin I can stand wearing thongs. Other than that, I stick with G-strings. I enjoy men's boxers (the old fashioned striped cotton kind) but I haven't dated a man who wears those in over 8 years.
30. I love green tea.
31. I still love Camel Lights, even though I don't smoke cigarrettes anymore.
32. Carmel, California is where I would live if I were really, really wealthy. 33. I once had everyone I knew convinced I needed to be a tit and ass model. And yes, they were that pretty.
34. I have really scared my friends a number of times by getting low blood sugar and just passing out. In Waffle House, in the car, at the mall, while driving, while swimming, while taking tests.......
35. My mother looks like a cross between Susan Sarandon and Geena Davis.
36. I was a brownie.
37. I grew up in Valencia, California and Danville, California. Went to high school in Cartersville, Georgia.
38. If you ever go to San Francisco, I recommend going in the fall, around October. You will fall in love and you will never leave. It is absolutely beautiful.
39. The Pacific Ocean smells better than the Atlantic.
40. I want to cage dive with Great White Sharks.
41. I still don't know what I wanna do when I grow up, and I think I am running out of time.
42. My favorite outfit is a stupid t-shirt and a pair of old man's cotton golf pants.
43. I have never had a tattoo, and I don't really plan on it.
44. I will never skydive. The man in the hospital bed next to my boyfriend, while my boyfriend was dying after his car accident, was the result of a skydiving accident. I will never forget how horrible he looked and how incredibly sad it was.
45. My married name was McGinnis. I never had it changed, though.
46. I miss my dog. I left him with my husband when I left because I knew he wouldn't let me take him. My ex later gave him away because he is an asshole.He was an amazing dog...smart, loyal and funny. Australian Shepherd. Stormy. Thinking about him makes me want to cry.
47. If I didn't think that eating pussy was so dang gross, I wouldv'e become a lesbian. Men are usually useless, except for their package. Speaking of packages....
48. Short men have bigger penises. It's usually the beanpole, shrimpy men who you send home the second they drop their briefs on your rug.
49. I've had a threesome. It is never worth it, and it is sooooo not like a porn. Nothing ends up that synchronized. It's all kind of mismatched and there's always one person who feels left out because they kind of are left out.
50. I had a cat from the time I was in Kindergarten until about three ago. She was ridiculously old. Long-hair black cat named Xanthippi.(Wife of Socrates, a bit of a nutcase. Great name for the cat).
51. I'm ridiculously sleep deprived. Averaging 4 hours per night and hating it.
52. One of my neighbors a long time ago was an ex-baseball player. He was an avid hunter, and had a "dead animal room" in his backyard where he kept heads. It was kind of cool.
53. Ever since the age of about 17, I have preferred men in their 30s. More fun in bed and more money.
54. My favorite car is a Packard.
55. I'm a really good swimmer. I qualified for the junior olympics. Never went.
56. My sister was locked up in a nutty hospital in Hollywood for about 18 months. I met a lot of interesting, f-ed up celebrities during her stay.
57. I'm not really big on pork. I do like sausage.
58. According to the old "wrap your hand around your wrist" test, I have a small bone structure. I never really believed that test. My left hip is bigger than your head.
59. I was granted a nickname in high school that I will never forget, it was so terrible. Everyone who knew me then knows what it is, and it seems to come up a lot at parties and reunions. I wish I were the girl everyone remembered for her bow tying skills, or sexually innocuous like the Molly Ringwald lipstick application from "The Breakfast Club".
60. My parents took me to a shrink when I was 10. I had an IQ test done. Ever since, I have never believed that those things determined your success in life. Emotional IQ is the way to go, baby.
61.I once had a drunken bathtub session (completely non-sexual on my part) with two gay men. A lot of fun.
62. My childhood celebrity crushes were Tom Selleck, Jeff Goldblum, Kevin Costner and John Cusack.
63. Speaking of Cusacks, my favorite love movie is "say anything".
64. I once died my hair turquoise. When I tried to fix it by dying it red, it turned lavender and began to fall out.
65. I also once had my tongue pierced.
66. Spartacus is a secret pleasure of mine.
67. I'm a Jeopardy addict.
68. My favorite California restaurants that I desperately miss are: The Good Earth, Marie Callendars, Jack in the Box, In and Out Burger, and Coco's.
69. I don't like chocolate, but I think I could live off of Scharffenberger. Hershey bought them and I am freaking out that the quality may change.
70. My shoe size is 8 1/2.
71. At last count, I have over 1000 movies. I am an addict. Off the top of my head, my favorites are: Papillon, L.A. Confidential, Say Anything, Little Dorrit, Annie, The Little Mermaid, Topper, Bugsy, Casino, Scarface, The Godfather trilogy.......
72. I collect rocks. I am attracted to a few - amethyst, peridot, and red quartz. Right now I am trying to save up money to buy pieces of meteorites - one, called Australite, looks like a little piece of stardust. I bought two tables from Pottery Barn teen - they have lift off plexiglass tops with chess boards under. I covered the chessboards in a sari, and they hold my rocks.
73. If I hadn't have had a mini fling with my boss, I would have been a graduate of chef school by now. Being that young and being semi-involved with a married family man was too weird. I would have been an amazing chef.
74. My grandmother, my mother, my sister and I have the same almond shaped birthmark on our right hip. Sign of a witch, if you ask me.
75. I read Tarot and I do okay. I lost my cards over two years ago, and I thought that meant something, so I haven't bought another set yet. I had a Camelot deck that was really beautiful.
76. I like Converse, Tods, Adidas' Samba, Bjorn, and platform/wedgie heels. I am willing to spend around $100 per pair. Only a few times have I really splurged and paid over $150, and I think one of those times it was for running shoes.
77. I was a Restoration Hardware junkie before they were a chain. I once spent an afternoon and evening in there checking out drawer knobs.
78. I would have made an amazing stylist...especially for men. I love men's clothes.
79. Coffee is a problem for me. During the typical workday, I drink 4 or 5 10 oz. cups.
80. When I was much younger, I wanted to do something in musical theatre. I worked in a few of the San Francisco Lamplighter's shows, and
I fell in love. Cole Porter is my favorite, along with Gilbert & Sullivan.
81. I have had sex and relationships with two men who later said they were gay. Yes, it was mentally scarring to think that I could have been the cause/ I didn't help lead them back to heterosexuality. What an ego. I got over it. The scarring part, I mean.
82. One of my favorite gay men is convinced that I will have his love child someday. If I weren't so in love with zee, I would be all about a drunken one night stand. He's a sweetheart.
83. I am one of those people who was meant to have a maid. It isn't that I am lazy, it's more a sign of genius in my opinion. I'm like the scatterbrained professor. I lose everything in my house. Having two other people around doesn't help.
84. I hate beets, huevos rancheros, stuffed green peppers, ham, and grits. 85. I love sushi, tomatoes caprese, caribbean food, stir fry, and rice.
86. I was in a front impact car wreck on 8/17/05, doing 70 mph, on I-75 North, 1 mile south of the Cartersville/Main Street Exit.
87. I got the herpes "A" simplex virus from my friend Nicole Rioux in 6th grade, by sharing her lipgloss. She got it from her boyfriend, Kevin something-or-another. Ever since, in times of extreme stress, I get cold sores. Really shitty.
88. My boyfriend Z and I share a love of containers. Pots, boxes, cans, you name it.
89. Painting is one of my favorite things to do - both artistic and just doing the walls. I am great at edging.
90. I am a complete believer in pheromones. Although I can't smell much since my long period of nasal passage numbing, I do smell people. Doesn't really matter if you have bathed. I know pretty quickly if I won't like you based on your smell.
91. My sister was the General Manager of a four-star Michelin restaurant located in Baltimore. One day, Gene Hackman, my mother's favorite actor, came in to eat. She called my mother, who put me on three way, and we waited in silence for her to run back and forth from Gene to the phone to give us updates about him. She said he was a very nice man, and looked much older in real life.
92. I was in love with the Sean Connery from James Bond for a long time, then I found out that he said in an interview that spousal abuse didn't really bother him. What an ass.
93. I like seersucker. I want a seersucker suit cut by Alberta Ferretti or Celine.
94. I need to golf more. From my limited experience, I really like golf. Anything that allows you to drink, ride around in a cute little cart, stay in nice hotels, and wear funky plaids, checks and stripes was meant for me. Besides, I am told I have a nice swing.
95. I could survive off of white rice, pickles, lemons with sugar, whole fruit popsicles, and bologna.
96. A long, long time ago, I was insistent that I was going to be a writer. I became afraid of my reality and no longer wanted to talk about it. Since my life is different now, and I can walk tall, I may change my mind again.
97. This is a big deep dark secret. When I was young and stupid, I wanted to run a cocaine cartel. I dated my way up the food chain because I thought I was headed towards the top. One day, I had an epiphany, and realized that there are all kinds of whores. They don't fuck just for money.
98. I know what love is. I believe it is such a rare thing that I daren't try to explain it.
99. I feel successful. Then, when I start having anxiety over money and bills, I feel petty and small. Worth could be achieved so easily if we weren't taught to inject money into the scenario.
100. My middle name is Lee. My mother is called that, although her name is LeAnne. Her father was called that, although his name was LeRoy. (Emphasis on the Luh). It's French.