CRASH BANG BOOM!

I’m starting to pick up on a recurring theme here.

Tuesdays: Upswing Day. Bouncing off the walls like an imbecile. Having way too much fun to do anyone any good.

Wednesdays: Crash and Burn, baby. Every problem in the world has emerged, and I feel incompetent, overwhelmed, and alone.

So I’m going to do today what I promised the Shrink I would do on Saturday.

First, I’m supposed to write down three things I need to say to myself when I’m feeling anxious. Last Wednesday evening (11:30 PM) I had an anxiety attack. Shrink-Man is trying to give me concrete tools to help me logically defray my anxiety. So here goes.

1. THIS IS JUST A MOOD. BECAUSE THIS IS JUST A MOOD, AND IT IS NOT A DEFINING CHARACTERISTIC OF ME, IT IS TEMPORARY. No matter how I feel, this is not a feeling that will last. I'm not doomed.

2. I NEED TO WORK ON MY LIST. I’ve been making a list on my anxious-days. It somehow makes me feel better to write down all the things that flood through my head, making me feel overwhelmed. These items need to be actionable, so that when I can complete them I can cross them off the list. After I have gotten some of these items out, and finished them, the situational anxiety ceases. This lightens my load, leaving me with JUST A TEMPORARY MOOD (See Item #1).

3. I NEED TO TAKE CARE OF MYSELF. For example, I haven’t eaten today and I’ve yet to test my blood sugars. I am not promoting emotional well-being by being neglectful of me. So I’m off to the fridge for my yogurt.



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